Breaking my bad habits

Friends often comment that I like to make life harder for myself and it’s quite true. This is because I’ve been happiest when I’m working on a difficult problem and I successfully solve it. Think back to moments when you’ve been really happy and fulfilled, and I’ll bet that it involved some element of overcoming a challenge as well.

One difficult problem I’m constantly working on right now is breaking my bad habits. I find that it’s easier to make bad habits harder to do than it is to remember a better habit so I purposefully build these bad habit roadblocks into my daily life. I count on myself to be too lazy to go around the minor inconvenience and default into the better habit.

Here is how I make my own life difficult and what I benefit from it.

Living further away from work
When I came to work at this school, I had a choice between on-campus or off-campus housing. On-campus housing is 2mins away from the office, and off-campus housing is 15mins away from the office. I chose to live further away. I did this because I (rightly) felt that it would be good to have time to gather my thoughts before I arrive at school and time to decompress before I arrive at home. As well, the gym here is still expensive so this is one way to force some exercise into my life. Once I unpacked and settled in there was no way I would be willing to re-pack and move everything over so I can only stay committed to this plan.

Plus, views like this on my way to work.

Never stay logged in to any website
I purposefully log myself out of all social media accounts and streaming websites to prevent mindless browsing. I can count on myself legitimately being too lazy to type in my email and password so if I open up facebook I will just close the tab. After the first week of doing this, I find that I don’t even accidentally open social media websites anymore. The crappy internet also helps to prevent me from using social media.

Unsubscribed from all news
The news is never happy, and it’s quite literally engineered to be addictive. I’ve been forcefully unsubscribed since I got to China because the internet stinks here and I’ve never been happier. I’m less sad and anxious all the time, my thoughts slow down and I worry less. I’m concentrated on only the things that directly impact me and things that I can change. It’s super freeing to ignore what doesn’t matter to you. I have no idea what movies are coming out, what's happening around the world, and it's been great.

Hang drying all my clothes
Even when I had a dryer I would still hang dry all my clothes. It greatly reduces wear and tear so I get to keep my favorites for longer. I don't like having a lot of clothing choices, and I'm picky about my clothing so I need each piece to really carry its weight. There’s also something very heartening about taking the time to touch and lay out all your clothing, caring for the things you own and not forgetting what you have. It’s also more eco-friendly and in the warmer days, it gets me out of the house.

A little warm spot on a cold day.

Use only cash
China is in 3019 while the rest of us are in 2019 in terms of online money transactions. I’m pretty sure I’m the only person here that uses cash. When I go to the farmer’s market, there’s a guy that will kill a chicken right in front of you and he accepts payment via WeChat. I use cash because the physical act of handling money forces me to think about how much I have left and how much I’m spending. I do find myself more mindful here than when I was living in London even though things here cost so much less.

Do you make life harder for yourself as well?

The good thing about bad internet.

I must be the first person to say that they love the internet in China.

To be clear, the internet here is crap. I have a VPN, and the internet works all the time, but the speed is SLOW and even the best VPN goes down once in a while. The VPN app on my phone is spotty often and doesn't load the usual social media apps either.

Despite all that, I still find myself much happier here than I was in London, and part of the reason is that the terrible internet is also terrible for my bad browsing habits.

Insert joke about the Great Firewall of China.

I no longer find myself doing any of the following because the speed is just not fast enough:

• Scrolling mindlessly on my phone
• Scrolling mindlessly on my laptop
• Watching Youtube mindlessly
• Watching Netflix mindlessly

As I can no longer do any of those things, I've had to find other ways of occupying my time, things like:

• Learning to be fluent in my mother tongue, Mandarin Chinese.
• Reading about history, economics, teaching, math, science, anything and everything.
• Learning how to cook better with Chinese ingredients
• Blogging
• Sort through photos
• Reflect on my teaching and become better at my craft

I've always been one of those FOMO types and learning and trying new things is of vital importance to who I am as a person. When I had access to all of the internet and various streaming services I found that I default to the lazy option in my downtime and didn't like it. I was absorbing new information but it was a lot of shallow bits of knowledge that's not useful in my life. My goal wasn't to be an encyclopedia, I want to be a maker, not a consumer. This made for a lot of cognitive dissonance since I wanted to do more but it was too easy to give excuses and justification after a long day of work.

Now, however, I find myself filling up my spare moments with things that really bring me value. No more  mental anesthesia. I notice that I'm much more social as well and pay better attention to friends when we hang out.

This past week, the VPN was down for 5 days and you would not believe how productive I was. I wrote up multiple drafts of blog posts when before I would do maybe 1 a week, I started sorting through my thousands of photos, and I also solidified my goals for 2019. I actually had time to start a few small side projects and it was just amazing.

Such as sorting through all the timelapses of the sunrise to find one that's focused correctly.

There's a lot of talk about digital detox in recent years, this is the equivalent of forcing myself to go to rehab. If you've been wondering how you can get more time to do things, move to China. If you can't move to China, I recommend these apps to simulate the benefits of Chinese internet.

What would you do if you can't use the internet as much? Would you take the time to rest or work on other projects?

Success is not just hard work

For my yearbook quote as a teacher, I wrote down "luck favours the brave". I also left it in a cafe where costumers can put sticky notes on the walls. Two colleagues who were with me saw what I wrote and we proceeded to have an interesting discussion of what really constitutes luck, and if the brave really do tend to be luckier.

The ambiguous conclusion we reached was the saying could be true or false depending on how you define lucky and bravery--as long as you like it and live a happy life, it doesn't matter. I still quite like the saying, but our talk did make me think about the role that luck has had in my life.

The Note Coffee in Ho Chi Minh City if you're ever in Vietnam. They also have delicious homemade gelato.

One definition of luck centres on the idea that it's something you didn't work for. For example, walking down the street and picking up a $5 bill, or being born to educated parents. The other 'luck' is closer to an opportunity that you got because of the work you put in, such as finding a good job because you worked to upgrade your skills and sent out a thousand resumes.

I don't think we acknowledge the first kind of luck enough for our successes in life. This can lead to a trap in thinking that our successes are because we are better people, better human beings. I'm dedicating this post to the lucky stuff I never worked for but helped me succeed in life, remind myself to be really freaking thankful every day.

My grade 10 math teacher
In high school, I was shy and stuck to my comfort zone of studying and getting good grades. Ms F was one of the first teachers who pushed me to take on leadership roles outside of academics. It's mind-boggling to think about the chain of events this triggered in my life, from that first club experience I tried other clubs, volunteered at conferences, applied to jobs, tried entrepreneurship, and moved overseas to see the world.

My parents didn't believe in TV
The last time we had cable TV was in grade 8, 12 years ago for me. Being a kid without a TV I had to find other sources of entertainment, like reading, drawing, cooking, and crafting. Many of the things I enjoy now I have to credit to reading: managing my finances, being emotionally aware, politics, and how to learn what I don't know. For two years I had Netflix and quite enjoyed that, but I cancelled it when I came to China and honestly haven't missed it. I've even noticed that the time I would usually spend watching a show I now use to work on other projects, like more reading, or becoming a better cook.

Immigrating to an English speaking country
I never appreciated speaking English fluently until I started working overseas, it opens doors like you wouldn't believe. Travelling through all of Europe and any major tourist destination is easy, browsing the internet is easy, accessing knowledge is easy, and getting work in non-English speaking countries is also easy. A Canadian graduate degree is very transferable to other countries vs. if I had a degree from China.

I don't like drinking
I've tried enough to know that I don't like the effects of it. It probably makes up 5% of my 15% savings rate while I was living in London. I'll take a small sip of a friend's drink to try the taste and then go back to enjoying my own glass of coke with a slice of lemon. I make enough dumb decisions sober.

Not quite coke with lemon but it'll do.

I grew up before Instagram
I feel like I dodged a bullet growing up before the age of social media and everything that involves. We're only now understanding more of the harmful effects of technology on self-esteem and neural development. This is not to say that technology is bad, but my parents certainly don't understand social media (even now) and pre-teen me had much less restraint than I do now, so that's a bad combination for a young person growing up. Now that I'm older, I enjoy social media moderately and keep an eye on any negative thoughts.

My friends
It is true that you are the average of the people you surround yourself with, and I lucked into some great finds early on. The first friends I made in Canada ensured that I tend to gravitate towards those kinds of friends later and it just continues to snowball. Every year I make new friends and I feel they just make my life better and better. In my second year of teaching, I had a minor tussle with depression for a few months, and it was through the support of my friends that I managed to come out of it whole.

My friends make me feel loved and floaty.

My health
Here's the worst chronic condition that I suffer from: seasonal allergies. The human body is a wondrous machine that can go wrong in so many ways, the chance that I managed to come out fully functional without major health issues is like playing Russian roulette 1000 times and winning. I can work harder, longer hours while I'm young and use this to speed up my retirement date.

And finally, the biggest one.

My parents cared
This is really winning the life lottery. They were educated and made sure I valued my education as well. Through good schools, I was exposed to high achievers, opportunities, and knowledge. I can speak English, which is the dominant international language. I had a lot of freedom and they never told me I can't do anything. The first time I learned that there was a stereotype about girls not being able to do math was in teacher's college, and it came as a shock. Were they the best parents? No. But they did try their best in the ways they knew how and gave me a better life than they had.

This is really quite an eye-opening experience in my own privileges and an acknowledgement that I'm not where I am only because I'm a better human than the next person, or even worked harder than them. I'm working now on paying it forward and being someone else's luck. Who knows, the student I spend some extra time with after school today can go on to make the world a better place.

*Hard work has nothing to do with luck as a privilege, but it does determine how much further you can take yourself. It's up to me to make the most of my good start in life.

This week in teaching

High lights

• The second week of Cooking Club! Good times were had by all. Ran a little long but it was worth it to see the kids enjoying themselves. Cooking club is so much fun for me. It takes me out of my usual teaching routine and helps me see the kids in a different light.
• Much better with lesson planning now and balancing my workload to have time for myself.
• Net worth updates are going well, took a dip due to month-long vacation but still on track.
• Colleague had a birthday this week and we got her cake, I also covered her desk with photocopies of my face. Her students also got her cake (twice!) and that just warms my heart so much. The cakes were also delicious.

Look how beautiful their pitas turned out. I'm so darn proud.

A generous helping of olive oil over garlic pre-roast.

Veggies ready to roast!

Low lights

• I'm incapable of sleeping only 4hr a night so I can be awake more to enjoy my life.

Overall
Still a fantastic time to be alive and in China. The fact that I had to make up a BS low light is proof enough of that.